When Positive Self Talk Isn't Very Positive

Positive self talk could actually be working against you, unless you did it correctly.

When you use false positive self talk, your brain knows that you are making it up, so it doesn’t work. An example is when you tell yourself, “You are awesome so you will nail it!”. However, deep down inside you know that you are just making up that statement to make you feel better, and so it doesn’t work.

Instead, if for example you are worried about low confidence and not being accepted, find moments from the past when you did succeed, when you were confident, and when your were accepted. Then, use these moments to remind yourself that you do have what it takes, because you’ve done it before.

When you use these evidence based memories as the basis of your positive self talk, it is far easier for your brain to believe you because it is connected with real events and real emotions.

So, allow your positive self talk to be, “I’ve got this because of the time when I … .”

Connect your real positive self talk with a power pose to create an even bigger boost in confidence. A power pose is when you take up as much space as possible, like a ‘Super-Man’ pose. More on the power pose another time.

Your challenge: set a reminder in your phone that says, “I’ve got this because …”.

Leave a rating and review in the podcast app or on iTunes as a way to help these messages reach more people just like you. If you leave a review, we will give you a shout-out on an upcoming episode.

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